Even for the most optimistic person, being happy-go-lucky 24/7 is a hard job. Although I try my darndest to be positive I’m sometimes cynical and often argumentative. Why? Well, because not all of the world’s problems can be solved with a smile and a cup of tea. And no, they won’t be solved with my desire to question attitudes and actions. However, it makes me feel a lot better to voice these thoughts, negative or positive. So, today I thought I would explain why you don’t need to be positive all of the time and also show you how you can view your opinions in a positive manner.
“POSITIVE VIBES ONLY”
Oh, how easy it is to say ‘positive vibes only’ and brush off any type of confrontation, negative opinion or questioning. In real life, things will happen that you don’t agree with. We will get angry or upset by actions of others. That’s what happens. But let’s be honest, when you say ‘positive vibes only’ when someone is being a dick, then you’re a part of the problem. People need to be told, “I don’t agree with you because…”
Why? Why should we tell people what we really think? Because opinions are what make the world develop, grow and help the progress of human behaviour. To be positive all the time would destroy that. Not only that, but it’s not exactly healthy to ignore any negative feelings.
HALF FULL OR HALF EMPTY?
I’ve always felt that I am more of a realist than an optimist or pessimist. If you’re emptying the glass, it’s half empty and vice versa when filling it. Things are what they are and I try my best to just get on with a situation and not worry myself too much about it. I will voice my thoughts and leave the conversation there.
You don’t have to always be happy and try to please everyone with an, “Oh that’s okay, that’s great, fabulous, wonderful,” approach. You can say, “I’m not happy, that’s shit.” That’s perfectly okay. You’re not a bad person to feel that way.
NOTHING NICE TO SAY
It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it. Another easy mantra to say but not necessarily do is, “If you have nothing nice to say don’t say it at all.”
I’m on both sides of the fence with this one. You don’t have to agree with everything but the way you put it across is incredibly important.
Oh, I love a good debate! Don’t you? I should take my own advice, though. I’m much better at writing my thoughts down than voicing them. I get frustrated when my point isn’t being made the way it should and I get agitated, making me appear angry. However, others are very eloquent in voicing their POV. This creates the illusion of optimism. It’s all about the words you use when your opinion is being voiced but isn’t a necessarily popular one.
WHAT IS A NEGATIVE POV & HOW CAN WE MAKE IT POSITIVE?
What do you class as negative? I guess this post could be classed as such. I think being angry about anything can also be received as rather pessimistic. Using negative terminology also is a big giveaway.
So, when you are making a post or are involved in a discussion which means you will say things like, “I don’t agree,” there are a few things you can do to make it more positive. Even if it’s not… Something I need to try a lot more!
- Use a positive tone of voice.
- Try to use more optimistic language. For example, rather than saying, “I hate the way bloggers all post about the same stuff,” Why not say, “I would love to see a larger variety in post types within the blogging community to create a refreshing perspective on the power of blogging?” This way you are saying the same thing but it sounds nicer!
- Write it exactly the way you feel and then go back to make it sound more positive.
- Be honest. Yes, be your brutally honest self but word it well. Be confident in your argument, consider other opinions and be open-minded to other people’s ideas and thoughts.
- Take your time to put together your argument, especially if you’re writing it as all you have are words as there’s no body language.
I’d like to point out that being positive all of the time, especially online, is no bad thing. It’s nice only reading positive posts when you’re feeling a bit negative about yourself. However, you don’t necessarily have to be all the time. It’s okay to be a bit like, “Wow, this is shit I’m going to tweet about it.”
So, my question to you is: do you think that too many bloggers are putting on this positivity persona when they should be using their voice to discuss important issues, thoughts and ideologies? Do you think more people should voice their opinion online or do you come to these bloggers for a positive, squeaky clean outlook on life? I’d like to know your thoughts!